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Newsletter Autumn 2005
Newsletter No5
Posted on: October 17th, 2005

Gercha Ya Yas Out...

Hi, another gig news and some exciting stuff in the pipeline about which we will keep you posted, so watch this space. As far as up-coming gigs go You may have noticed on the web-site that those loveable 'Rockney' legends Chas'n'Dave have invited us to attend, as special guests, their Christmas Beano show at the Shepherds Bush Empire, we were very pleased to accept this invitation, Sir Mick in particular is busily mugging up the rhyming slang of his youth ..... "I need a Jimmy" (Jimmy Choos - shoes).... "light us a Prada" (Prada Bag - fag).... "Fancy popping up the Apples & Pear" (Berkley Square)... Mick does have his limits mind, he says he always draws the line when asked to "Luva Duck", never mind having a "Gander"

Newletter No 6
Posted on: November 5th, 2005

Keith's Just a Regular Guy

I have to say I'm feeling a bit flush at the moment. I chanced upon Keith one morning last week, spark out after a particularly heavy night's indulgence. Being something of traditionalist and with him in no position to object, I decided to take this opportunity to observe an ancient English custom. So with the aid of an old wheel barrow blagged off Charlie's dad, the 'Human Stiff' has, even at a penny a go, proved a pretty decent little earner for me if he did but know it. It's true I've had to weather the odd criticism about the shabby state of my rather iffy effigy and to be honest, sartorially, he could be said to be one flute short of a the whistle compared to most of the local offerings around. Mind you, I could have still done with out that pushy Yank bint, who's recently shacked up with Mick, sticking her oar in. She would keep cornering me and tell me how she could do a style make over that would be "so really cool" and how a Guy's image is "Like so really really more important than personality".

In truth, this is a time of year when I do contemplate with a degree of trepidation the traditional annual celebratory events of the moment. As I write, Mssrs Popkins and Waylor have been busily at work organising the Band's Guy Fawkes bonfire night do and for which Nicky has promised a stunning grand finale. "Never mind A Bigger Bang man, this'll blow your sock's off"... "or somebody's" sniggers Mick W. Although they are remaining extremely tight-lipped, I was disturbed to find a well thumbed biography on Werner Von Brown lying around. I am hearing rumours that their plans involve rigging an unsuspecting Byron's wings' with rockets, in the hope that we may be treated to a spectacular fly past by the Band's Spiritual Founder as a climax to the night's events. I am none too optimistic about the outcome, after all, Von Braun was aiming for the stars.... not with one, also, as I recall, he did in anycase have a tendency to miss rather a lot and hit London instead. Well I guess it can't be much worse than last year when Mick and Keith ended up not speaking after Keith's disparaging remarks made about the size of Mick's Roman Candles and then Bill spent the whole night complaining that the Squibs he bought weren't damp enough.

However, rocket scientists or not, we will be back taking care of business at Rayners Lane and Hollywood Restaurant next weekend, hope you can make it. Following on, the band have been honoured with the task of entertaining the 400 A-list musical celebrity guests due to attend Stephen Wooleys Carnaby St premier party on the 16th, for "Stoned", his much publicised film about the life and tragic demise of Brian Jones.