we sailed away for a month and a day to the land where the
Bong trees grow.... yeah! in yer dreams Byron.... however
it's fair to say Rollin Stoned did embark on some fairly epic
trips over a stormy June and a "beautiful Pea Green Boat"
would have come in handy at times.... it would seem there's
nothing like a season of summer festivals to stimulate the
diuretic capacity of the heavens.
that you'd notice from the throngs of you who pitched up to
our recent shows in the north, we do like an audience in throngs,
particularly around our stage.... or shoreline as we have
come to regard it. But it has brought home to us that we are
maybe missing a trick here. So for our next round of excursions,
our marketing boys are suggesting we augment our merchandising
stock with Rollin Stoned Snorkels and Scuba gear, possibly
even the odd T-Shirts with adapted blow holes so to cater
for the occasional passing Porpoise potential.
so we've come to it...... 'woo! woo! woo! "....alright
now I want you to put down the cigarette, stub it out and
move slowly away from the pack keeping your hands visible
and clear of your mouths...."
Yep! no more smoke getting in our eyes, we can now legally
live happily ever after, the air we all breath will no longer
be an eye watering cocktail of collateral exhaust from countless
charred and decrepitly wheezy bronchial reserves of inconsiderate
others, merely polluted by the self righteous halitosis emanating
from the sighs of relief of the incumbent new model nanny
as of now, anyone caught lighting up a fag at any of our shows
will end up in 'chokey'..... bit of dilemma for whoever's
job it is to run the follow spot on Mick then....
As I am sure you can imagine, this topic has engendered an
awful lot of whinging from the inveterate addicts within the
band. Personally, having spent a career in sufficiently close
proximity to 'The Human Whiff' to have, despite being a non-smoker,
acquired a habitual taint of one who uses "Eau de Fin
de Chien' as an aftershave, I have been feeling somewhat smug,
however, sadly it would seem, from information I have just
received, my joy maybe a tad premature, I quote.... "Performers
- 6. Where the artistic integrity of a performance makes it
appropriate for a person who is taking part in that performance
to smoke, the part of the premises in which that person performs
is not smoke-free in relation to that person during his performance.
know it occurs to me that this poses an interesting legal
conundrum M'lud, for whilst Keith Richard can scarcely claim
smoking is an essential element of his artistic integrity
since that would be a get out excemption for millions and
render the law useless, a performer portraying him in an earlier
incarnation would seem to have a case...... life can be so
unfair when you're a mega-rich superstar.
have another fairly hectic month ahead, and some great shows
and events in prospect for July, so hopefully we will be hoisting
up the 'Jolly Roger' at a port near you, although quite what
Roger has to look so jolly about I don't know, what with a
hoist up him.